It's raining, I'm standing on a piece of wood
I shoot around, fighting for my life
Even though this war cannot come to any good
Me and my comrades fight through blood and strife
We fight through day and night long
A man runs towards us during the night
We all wake up at the sound of the gong
Bracing ourselves for our night time fight
2 comments:
Nat,
I like how you described the life of a soldier during WWI and I think your poem has good rhythm. Also, I like how you rhymed the lines. The pictures showed the lives of soldiers in the trenches, which I think fitted well with the poem. But I think using more sensory details to describe the life of that soldier would have made the poem more effective. GOOD JOB, NAT!!
HyeJin
I think you're poem was pretty good. I like how you made every other line rhyme. I also think you had good rhythm. Next time, you could have made the poem a bit longer and added some more about the trenches to it. Also, you could use some more imagery or elements of poetry like similes or metaphors to show instead of tell. You have good pictures, but maybe you could put them around the poem instead of all at the bottom. Other than that, good job.
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